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Coaching makes change happen quicker!

November 19, 2009 – 4:49 pm

I’ve been on a new journey since my last blog – adding to my existing NLP tools – I’ve now become a Practitioner of Time Line Therapy™ and Hypnosis!

It’s been an exciting journey with new experiences, new destinations and plenty of revelations and laughs along the way.  Being a life coach means being equipped to help my clients find the right path for them.  Facilitating the changes they choose to make.  NLP, TLT™ and Hypnosis are wonderful set of techniques – or tools for my ‘coaching tool bag’!

I guess prior to 2004, I had so many limiting beliefs, so much ‘stuff’ was holding me back – I didn’t know what to do for the best, I felt truly ‘stuck’ in life… it felt like I had no options, hadn’t a clue what to do to push forward.  During that dark time one of my best friends Helen, told me about an interview she’d heard on LBC radio station.  A guy called Andy Harrington had been speaking about ‘creating the life you desire’ and she’d chosen to go to an event called Fire Your Desire – similar to Antony Robbins UPW.  I was so excited to hear how well it had gone for her and how she had had some huge emotional shifts and had made some positive decisions about how she was going to live the rest of her life.  I was excited for her and felt compelled to go on the next event for myself!  I had no idea what coaching or NLP was at that stage, they weren’t words in my world.

On the 3 day FYD in London we (200 people) all worked on our own ‘stuff’, with Andy guiding us through each day and really playing hard ball with our resistance at times.  We all chose to walk a 25 feet fire walk – which was an awesome experience – and showed as all how we could survive stretching our ‘comfort zones’ and make a choice to live a bit more on the outside – in our ‘adventure zones’.  Many of the techniques were used that long weekend were NLP and Coaching… wow… it began to wet my desire. 

From that moment, my world expanded.  I began to choose what I did, and began looking at the world through a different pair of eyes.  I can’t say that by going on a 3 day workshop I was completely changed or that I made better decisions generally, but I did choose to learn from the feedback of those decisions and not repeat them! :)   I also learned that you need to take responsibility for what you have in your life – you have attracted all you have by the thoughts you have.  By one or two things changing… it was like the domino effect… other things began to shift.  Sometimes I would shock myself by the way I reacted to something said or experienced – I would realise I’d handled it in a completely new way – and give myself a metaphorical pat on the back! :)  It also helped me to have a friend who was also on this journey of personal development, someone who encouraged me to be positive, make choices and take responsibility for those choices – good or bad – she was my coach.

 Life isn’t always easy, but that doesn’t mean we should lie down and take it… we need to change our strategies for success and push through the pain barrier.  It’s so worth it.

So now in 2009, I am now able to work with clients on a one to one basis (workshops coming in the new year) helping them to ‘un-stick’ themselves, helping them to design the life they would really like to have, breaking down the invisible barriers of thought that have kept them down or prevented them from having what they really want.  Supporting and championing them, listening to them carefully and then asking the questions they have not asked themselves (or have not wanted to answer before).  Sometimes, we keep doing the same things, getting the same results and think we don’t know how to do things differently.  Coaching speeds the process up, releases you from the cage you’re trapped in…

This is an exciting time – what would you like from 2010?  It’s not far away now… if you are wanting more from life, or have a goal you want to achieve but could do with someone to encourage you – believe in you – contact me.  If you have a negative voice in your head telling you ‘I can’t do it’ or words to that effect – contact me, we can change that voice for something far more empowering! :)

By Ali Soleil | Posted in Personal Development | Tagged Antony Robbins, Coaching, comfort zone, encourage, living, NLP, supporting and championing | Comments (0)

Teenage Choices

November 4, 2009 – 11:24 pm

Being a responsible parent comes with so much unknown territory – wouldn’t you agree?  We don’t get taught this stuff and even if we did – every child is a unique soul, living in their own sense of reality with their own set of life choices and decisions to make.  As a parent we cannot possibly know the full extent of the world our children live in.  We all filter what we see, hear and feel every day differently and we do not shadow our children 24/7.  We trust in what we’ve taught them and that the decisions they make will be good ones (and learn from the ones that turned out not to be so fabulous).

My girls are 16 and 17 years old, they are truly my greatest blessings in life.  So when they are at a cross roads in life choosing which path to travel along – it’s easy for me to make suggestions on what I think they could/should be doing; afterall it’s called ‘being a good parent’ isn’t it? 

I’m discovering how important it is for them to make their own choices without too much pressure being put upon them by me – or their father.  With so much external input not only from us they can become unsure of which path to go down; they also lose a sense of identity – a conflict within, whom to please, what to do first… and maybe they want to have a complete rethink anyway.   From my experience we either move towards or away from what we’re told to do.  When told we will not achieve something – we may think ‘I’ll show you!’ or ‘Well I just won’t bother then’….

I remember trying to fulfil the wishes of my parents as I was growing up.  Taking jobs which they thought were best for me…. but I did not enjoy them, these jobs were not fulfilling my values – I was not being true to my core.  I have to remember to this. 

There is a fine line between parental apathy (‘oh, let them find their own way forward – or not’), parental guidance (‘check out these opportunities, have you considered x y and z?’) and being  parentally pressuring (‘get down to the careers office now, you must do this… you’ll regret it if you don’t')….

I figure with my girls – I give them all the opportunities I can, I encourage, praise and ensure they know I’m proud of them… they can live at home feeling secure and loved.  It’s down to them to choice their path, I’m here to give external support and encouragement but it’s their lives and most of all – their happiness is my priority.

It’s tough being a parent sometimes! ;)

By Ali Soleil | Posted in Parenting, Teenage development | Tagged being a good parent, encourage, happiness, life choices, opportunities, Parenting | Comments (2)

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