Coaching

What do you want?

October 19, 2010 – 10:03 pm

When you’re thinking about your life and looking forward, do you know what you really want?

Knowing what you want is the important thing. Not to worry about the ‘how’… but to keep focused on the outcome, what you want to happen and not get bogged down in the nitty gritty of how it will become your reality.

It’s good for you to have some clarity about what you really want. Most of us know what we don’t want and struggle to know what we do want. As you’re reading this, I know you are wanting to gain higher self esteem and confidence. Imagine how different your home life, family life, career, finances etc will be once you have built these up - these are your reasons for building your self esteem in the first place. If you are unclear about what you want and maybe there are some grey areas in your thinking. You’re not alone, so many clients struggle with this and they book me for a coaching session or more. If you’d like to devote some special time to exploring and discovering just what you do want, email me at ali@daringdamsels.com this is your life, you deserve it to be a fulfilling and happy one!

So, whatever you want or dream of, get into the habit of asking yourself – or even praying to a higher power for an answer every night before you fall asleep. Ask for the way to be shown to you. You may well wake up with more ideas – write them down and keep pen and paper by your bed ready.

What I’ve started doing more recently is keeping a diary just to record the bursts of inspiration. So often we do not do anything with this information or ideas which come from our higher self/Universe and yet they are the very gifts which will guide us on our path. Today I looked at my diary again and had already forgotten to take action on some points – so I was so grateful for having recorded them. That’s what we all do, we get the messages, think wow and then we forget them, so I urge you to keep a record of them and begin taking action.

The way to achieve your dreams may not seem probable or realistic at first glance, it does not mean that it is impossible, just open your mind… and be aware that sometimes the way will be shown in a less likely way than the obvious.

Quote of the day

”Don’t limit yourself. Many people limit themselves to what they think they can do. You can go as far as your mind lets you. What you believe, remember, you can achieve.” Mary Kay Ash

Wishing you all you wish for yourself

Ali xx

Feminine Self Esteem Mentor – www.DaringDamsels.com

By Ali Soleil | Posted in Blog, Goal Setting, happiness, Life Challenges, Perfect Days, Personal Development, self esteem | Tagged ali soleil, Coaching, confidence, daringdamsels, dreams, focus, goals, gratitude, guide, higher self, life coaching, life journey, self esteem, universe, want | Comments (0)

Is money your friend or foe?

June 18, 2010 – 10:00 am

How would you describe your relationship with money? If you were to think about it, is money your friend or your evil enemy?

Some of us do not have a good association with money and struggle to make it. When we do have money – we don’t hold on it for long. Some of us can’t get enough of it – we know how we are going to spend it and have a never ending supply. Which are you? What causes these extremes?

It’s our psychology that affects this relationship – and often it’s a belief we’ve inherited from our parents from a young age – their beliefs around money can become ours.

When I coach ladies who are not having a good experience with money, I often discover that they do not feel they deserve to have it and it slips through their fingers very quickly. I dig a bit deeper and they discover they don’t actually like money very much.

Some of them been brought up by parents who have said things like ‘money doesn’t grow on trees’, ‘people with money have ripped others off’, ‘the bank manger is God’, ‘money corrupts’, ‘money is evil or dirty’. As they explore they realise these beliefs have been holding them back and what they have been costing them! If you’re unconsciously pushing it away – how can you attract it at the same time? This is where I support them to make the decision to believe something more empowering – and certainly improve their relationship with money.

I also work with women who are selling a service or a product they have created themselves, who feel uncomfortable about charging. They find it hard to receive payment for something they love doing.

I believe we all deserve to get paid for what we do. To feel proud of our achievements and get paid a fair price for giving of our skills and experience. I am sure that Madonna has more money than she could ever spend – and yet she still charges top dollar for doing what she loves – because then we value it.

What is your relationship with money? Could you do with some support to change your negative beliefs? When will be a good time to do that – now or later? What are your beliefs costing you? If you had more money, how would you choose to spend it? What changes would you make to your lifestyle? Do let me know – comment or email me ali@daringdamsels.com

Wishing you an abundance of all good things!

Ali xxx

By Ali Soleil | Posted in happiness, Life Challenges, Personal Development | Tagged choice, Coaching, deserve, dirty, empowering beliefs, enemy, evil, limiting beliefs, money, relationship, spending money | Comments (0)

Ready to transform from Fed Up to Fabulous?

June 6, 2010 – 6:27 pm

I hope you’ve had a lovely weekend and enjoyed the sunshine. I spent my Saturday in Manchester with some of my coaching friends. It’s the second time I’ve only been there and walking in heat I thought ‘It feels like I’m on holiday!’ how great is that? I hope you’ve had some fun too.

The weekend is coming to an end now, the rain is falling and the new week is approaching fast – is your heart sinking knowing you’ve got to go back to work or be alone with the kids again, back to the routine?

I remember having that dreadful sinking feeling EVERY Sunday…

It was a lonely, stomach churning feeling. I remember thinking ‘there must be more to life than this…’ but not knowing what that was. Knowing it was within my grasp but not quite reaching it.

What did I want? What do you want?

Do you ever think you’re ‘existing’ but not ‘living’? Not sure what to do? Not feeling fabulous or fulfilled?

I spend years trying to find the answers on my own – it just wasn’t happening and for me, my self esteem was on the floor – I was pretty fed up with being me and my life.

When you don’t know what you want, it’s hard to know where to focus.

I found support, re-designed my life by discovering my passion, raising my self esteem – and now everyday is a ‘jump out of bed’ day!

I was watching the repeat of Britain’s Got Talent this afternoon. Christopher Stone, an accountant said from being a small child he knew he was a performer. When he sings he knows he’s being who he really is. Piers Morgan encouraged him to give up what he doesn’t enjoy and follow his passion – sharing his incredible voice with the world.

If this resonates with you and you know this is your time for change – you are ready to invest in your future, discover your ‘truth’, raise your self esteem, live life with a spring in your step, passion in your heart whilst feeling feminine and fabulous then I have just the thing for you.

Ok Ali, what is it?

I am ready and eager to support you! I am SO excited to be offering FIVE ladies the opportunity of individually spending a day in June with me, at the fabulous price of £497. These special ‘Fed Up to Fabulous’ days will be face to face in the Buckinghamshire area. If you are ready to commit, you will enjoy this life changing, magical day which will start at 10.00am and finish by 4.00pm. There are selected week days and currently a few weekend dates available.

I have many skills up my sleeve to support you including coaching, mentoring, NLP, Time Line Therapy even Hypnosis and can offer an interest free payment plan to split the investment into two payments. You’ll need to be quick to book as one place has just been booked! Please go to www.daringdamsels.com and see the empowered words other clients have said after working with me.

Imagine this – it is July 2010 – it’s Sunday evening you are feeling relaxed – you can’t wait for tomorrow, as you are following your passion, ready to jump out of bed in the morning and feeling FABULOUS! Is that good?

I’m ready to get started, are you? If you would like one of the Fed Up to Fabulous days, please email me back without delay ali@daringdamsels.com.

Have a great week, wishing you love and happiness

Ali xx

By Ali Soleil | Posted in happiness, Life Challenges, Perfect Days, Personal Development, self esteem | Tagged Coaching, dream, fabulous, Fed Up to Fabulous, feminine, gift to the world, jump out of bed, NLP, passion, self esteem, Sunday feeling, truth, work tomorrow | Comments (0)

Daring Damsels doing it for themselves!

February 6, 2010 – 9:19 pm

Hey I’m not blogged for a few weeks! Hope you’re all well and happy :) I’ve been busy with my Daring Damsels!

I ran my first workshop at the end of January. It was a ladies self esteem booster workshop and we all had a great time. It was wonderful to see these ladies who arrived as strangers leave as friends. They really played full out, listened carefully, and shared their own experiences freely. They explored their own patterns of behaviour and committed to themselves a decision to change.

A week on, I am so impressed to hear of their progress. Listening to their own self talk and choosing to change it, to focus on what they are want – not on what they don’t want, thinking about how they are seeing the world – through their ‘filters’, questioning their beliefs – which are not true and not serving them and replacing them with more empowering beliefs… it’s all great stuff! And, I’m so proud of them all!

Isn’t amazing how we think it’s ‘just me’ and yet it can be really liberating to find that others feel the same way – and together we can embark on making change happen so you can live a more fabulous and fulfilling life?

I met a lady a few months ago at a conference with some amazing women speakers. She said to me “‘it’s all right for them, but I’m in my 50’s and my self esteem is low… I’m too old to change”. I had to question this and she didn’t want to change. And that’s ok. It’s her choice. However, I think we need to consider if we feel we are not living the life we’d really like – it’s down to us to make the change. After all, what has low self esteem cost us in the past, how will it continue to shrink our choices? I know from my own experience I’ve missed out on many opportunities because I didn’t know if I could handle the situations or questioned my own abilities – and talked my self out of them.

It’s not a very positive way to live, is it?

So these fabulous ladies who came to my Daring Damsels workshop were just so ready to get out of their own way, smash down their own barriers and begin living life again. The journey of change isn’t easy, we have well trodden paths. If we truly want to make the change we can do it, no matter what our age – it just takes a shift in thought! The rewards are waiting – and they are fabulous!

I’m going to be coaching these ladies on a one to one basis and arranging further workshops – if you would like to find out how I can help you too, please message me through my web site www.daringdamsels.com Come on ladies – let’s make 2010 our best year ever.

Here is a message from one of the ladies who was there.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1-uv3wujDzQ]

By Ali Soleil | Posted in happiness, Perfect Days, Personal Development, self esteem | Tagged any age, behaviour, beliefs, Coaching, daring damsels, ladies, opportunities, questioning abilities, self esteem, women, workshop | Comments (0)

Christmas Countdown

December 20, 2009 – 11:11 am

Just been thinking about how great it would be to have a Christmas Coach… I don’t know about you… but with the clock ticking I’m still way behind where I would like to be. I imagine I’ve missed the last post on the Christmas Cards and they are only half written. Still I’ll get them finished today and posted in the morning. Every year it is the same, it’s an area I really need to work on and change my approach. May be I could write next years cards today with the this years! Nah, that’s cheating… and the names and addresses may change over the next 365 days!

The girls are going to help me put up the tree this afternoon which will be wonderful, always nice to put the tree up together and share in the excitement of seeing all the old favourite tree decorations coming out of hibernation again.

Having a coach would have got me on track, scheduling time for making things happen and thinking about the good Christmas feelings that I would had had instead of the slightly panicked ones I feel now… oh well, it will all get done before Friday It has to!

How are you doing with your Christmas preparation? What areas in your life would benefit from coaching? What difference would it make to you? Having someone support you and shine the light in the areas that you’re not seeing is fantastic…. Definitely going to get some support next year on my Christmas plans; so that when I’m 5 days before the big day, I’m feeling relaxed, sorted and full of joyful anticipation!

By Ali Soleil | Posted in Christmas | Tagged cards, Christmas, christmas preparation, Coaching, decorations, life coaching | Comments (0)

Synergy and support

November 27, 2009 – 12:25 am

Oh what a lovely day I’ve had… this morning I popped along to my favorite shop – John Lewis for an informal ladies networking monthly event called Cappuccino Connections. It’s organised by Athena Networking group and locally about 40 women met for a natter and networking… oh and a cappuccino or something. It’s so great to meet so many like minded people who are interested in what you do and to share their business story. There seems to be such synergy between so many of us. I’ve learned along the way how important it is to surround myself with a supportive peer group. Sometimes when we share our dreams and goals with our friends and family their response can truly cause us to burst our bubble (we’re responsible for our own thoughts and decisions to take on board other peoples negative comments). We allow our dream to die – or we can put on the back burner for another time. I’ve certainly done this in the past. Often those closest to us do not want us to change because this could ultimately change the relationship we share – or they do not want us to fail… so lovingly would rather keep us in our place. Being part of a supportive network provides not only momentum for progression by being an encouraging sounding board - but also can give some leads to help establish the business. Having fellow coaches to support and believe in me and my goals makes the journey even more exciting and the ride smoother.

Who do you surround yourself with? How does your peer group support you? How determined are you to reach your goals? – How unshakable are they?

I’ve travelled up to Birmingham this afternoon on the train. It’s my second time ever being in this city. It feels vibrant and looks colourful. Tomorrow I am going to Jo Cameron’s Women on Their Way conference – I can’t wait.. it promises to be a fabulous event with lots of inspiring speakers and great workshops. I’m hoping to build my peer group here too… how great will it be to have new friends in another city?:) Wonderful! So I’m off to sleep now dreaming of my goals, feeling grateful for my friends, family, peers and coaches… and aptly I’m staying in a hotel called Nite Nite! Night all

By Ali Soleil | Posted in Networking, Perfect Days | Tagged Birmingham, cappuccino connections, Coaching, goals, Networking, peer group, support, synergy | Comments (0)

Dreams v Reality = Adventure Zone

November 20, 2009 – 6:17 pm

So, for years now… my girls and I have imagined living in Brighton. Living within a city for the first time – a place so diverse and alive. And by the seaside… I love the sea, having always lived one hour 30 mins from the nearest coastal spot, it’s a novelty and gives me a rush of energy and new perspectives when I see it.

We have sat countless times on the pebble beach looking out on the twinkling sea which always draws us close. We conjure up whilst we much our sandwiches (actually we have been known to buy a box of chocolates and consume them on the beach too! I digress) how life could be living there. We’ve even imagined running a small boutique hotel on the sea front - my younger daughter having picked out an old hotel, looking like it needs a new lease of life and some love put into it. But really, I think living in Brighton as a life coach/NLP Practitioner would be fabulous – afterall, with the wonders of the internet and telephone – I can coach anywhere!

A close friend of mine suggested that ‘Brighton is the grave yard of ambition’. At the time, I was a little disgruntled – to his obvious amusement… however on reflection – that makes Brighton the perfect place to be a coach. There are people all over the world - not just Brighton who have had dreams but who have been talked out of them and they lie dormant waiting to see daylight once more. I’d love to move to Brighton and assist people with evoking their dreams and making them reality – how fabulous would that be?

So, my dream… to move to Brighton June 2010 with my daughter who is 16 years old. My elder daughter will be spreading her wings and will be off to Uni or another path – so will not be living with us then.

In order to achieve this dream – I need to pull out all the stops. It feels daunting right now, but I know that is just my unconscious mind trying to protect me – keep me in my comfort zone. So I must push through this barrier and break into my adventure zone…

My daughter is so excited about making this dream a reality; so this week we have been to Brighton to the sixth form college’s open evening. Afterall, you have to fake it til you make it, right? By going to the open evening, we have set our intention… we have made a commitment to ourselves to make this dream our reality. Soon after the drama of finding somewhere to park we walked up some roads towards the college. It was a magical experience. We looked at the long white terraces of houses and flats and wondered which one we’d be living in. It’s an exciting feeling moving to the unknown. I can feel the excitement but I can also feel the resistance… it feels slightly scary, but that’s a good thing – it means I know I can do it and it’s out of my comfort zone.

I have made a dream board with some pictures of Brighton, some seaside pictures, I have the sound of the sea and the cry of the seagulls in my head and the taste of crepes from the pier in my memory… it’s all about focusing on what you want – really feeling it as if you have it already. It’s about setting the date of when you know you’ve achieved it, setting steps to reach the goal, committing and taking action!

What are your dreams? How committed are you to making them your reality? How does breaking into your ‘adventure zone’ make you feel? What difference to your life will it make when you’ve achieve your goal? What will happen if you don’t? What’s the first step you need to take? If you need some help with achieving your goal – message me

By Ali Soleil | Posted in Personal Development | Tagged Brighton, Coaching, comfort zone, commitment, dreams, goals, reality, sandwiches | Comments (4)

Coaching makes change happen quicker!

November 19, 2009 – 4:49 pm

I’ve been on a new journey since my last blog – adding to my existing NLP tools – I’ve now become a Practitioner of Time Line Therapy™ and Hypnosis!

It’s been an exciting journey with new experiences, new destinations and plenty of revelations and laughs along the way. Being a life coach means being equipped to help my clients find the right path for them. Facilitating the changes they choose to make. NLP, TLT™ and Hypnosis are wonderful set of techniques – or tools for my ‘coaching tool bag’!

I guess prior to 2004, I had so many limiting beliefs, so much ‘stuff’ was holding me back – I didn’t know what to do for the best, I felt truly ‘stuck’ in life… it felt like I had no options, hadn’t a clue what to do to push forward. During that dark time one of my best friends Helen, told me about an interview she’d heard on LBC radio station. A guy called Andy Harrington had been speaking about ‘creating the life you desire’ and she’d chosen to go to an event called Fire Your Desire – similar to Antony Robbins UPW. I was so excited to hear how well it had gone for her and how she had had some huge emotional shifts and had made some positive decisions about how she was going to live the rest of her life. I was excited for her and felt compelled to go on the next event for myself! I had no idea what coaching or NLP was at that stage, they weren’t words in my world.

On the 3 day FYD in London we (200 people) all worked on our own ‘stuff’, with Andy guiding us through each day and really playing hard ball with our resistance at times. We all chose to walk a 25 feet fire walk – which was an awesome experience – and showed as all how we could survive stretching our ‘comfort zones’ and make a choice to live a bit more on the outside – in our ‘adventure zones’. Many of the techniques were used that long weekend were NLP and Coaching… wow… it began to wet my desire.

From that moment, my world expanded. I began to choose what I did, and began looking at the world through a different pair of eyes. I can’t say that by going on a 3 day workshop I was completely changed or that I made better decisions generally, but I did choose to learn from the feedback of those decisions and not repeat them! I also learned that you need to take responsibility for what you have in your life – you have attracted all you have by the thoughts you have. By one or two things changing… it was like the domino effect… other things began to shift. Sometimes I would shock myself by the way I reacted to something said or experienced – I would realise I’d handled it in a completely new way – and give myself a metaphorical pat on the back! :) It also helped me to have a friend who was also on this journey of personal development, someone who encouraged me to be positive, make choices and take responsibility for those choices – good or bad – she was my coach.

Life isn’t always easy, but that doesn’t mean we should lie down and take it… we need to change our strategies for success and push through the pain barrier. It’s so worth it.

So now in 2009, I am now able to work with clients on a one to one basis (workshops coming in the new year) helping them to ‘un-stick’ themselves, helping them to design the life they would really like to have, breaking down the invisible barriers of thought that have kept them down or prevented them from having what they really want. Supporting and championing them, listening to them carefully and then asking the questions they have not asked themselves (or have not wanted to answer before). Sometimes, we keep doing the same things, getting the same results and think we don’t know how to do things differently. Coaching speeds the process up, releases you from the cage you’re trapped in…

This is an exciting time – what would you like from 2010? It’s not far away now… if you are wanting more from life, or have a goal you want to achieve but could do with someone to encourage you – believe in you – contact me. If you have a negative voice in your head telling you ‘I can’t do it’ or words to that effect – contact me, we can change that voice for something far more empowering!

By Ali Soleil | Posted in Personal Development | Tagged Antony Robbins, Coaching, comfort zone, encourage, living, NLP, supporting and championing | Comments (0)

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Is money your friend or foe?

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Dreams v Reality = Adventure Zone

Coaching makes change happen quicker!

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